Life is short, serve selflessly

“People don't care how much you know unless they know how much you care” 

• John Maxwell

They always say that life comes at you fast and if you don’t move quick, you’ll get knocked over.  Life for me has been fairly consistent as it relates to daily ups and downs.  We use those tougher times to appreciate how far we’ve come.  I’ve learned over my lifetime as well that we can’t get through this journey on our own, even though we try and try all the time.  

A word that’s been resonating with me lately and gives me positive chills each time I hear or speak the word, is kindness.  Kindness towards others, kindness during the good times and kindness during the challenging times.  When you display kindness, it gives others permission to show kindness as well.  Kindness can be something as simple as smiling at someone passing by, saying good morning to them even when they’re staring at the ground or another direction, or holding the door open for someone who has their hands full.  

In order to show kindness, it helps to be as genuine as you can be.  People who practice kindness and are in the world of sharing their kindness with others can tell when you truly care and want them to shine.  Kindness is a two way street and I’ve had so many examples of others in my life (family, friends, co-workers) that showed the utmost amount of kindness and modeled the way through kindness.  When I think of what makes kindness truly special, I think of the following ways that highlight my kindness recipe for success.

1. Patience - We know all too well in life that everyone is going through something (both positive and challenging) at any time in their lives.  When you display kindness (both large and small) to others, you may not get an immediate response.  In those times of a visible response from others, remember to not take it personal and utilize empathy to walk a mile in their shoes.  Maybe they recently had a family member pass away, had a challenging day at work, or are tired from an overnight work shift.  Acceptance of kindness takes time for some and is easily attained with others.  Some of those who you meet in life haven’t had many opportunities to be shown kindness and could truly not know how to react.  Practicing random acts of kindness daily and consistently will ensure that others are appreciating your effort, even if they don’t acknowledge it directly.

2. Understanding - Life can sometimes be all about assumptions.  We assume that everyone had the same background, family support, and home upbringing that we did.  We also over assume that everyone we interact with had the same educational opportunities, loving family members, and an overabundance of friends.  When we allow empathy to enter our mindset and life views, we develop a stronger view of reality that can include unloving parents, abusive friends, loneliness, abandonment, and lifelong anger/sadness.  A life philosophy that’s resonated with me over the years is that everyone in life is looking for a true opportunity to be seen and heard.  We don’t know what goes on in the lives of others, however, I can tell you that when you practice kindness and smile at someone, say hi to them, or ask them about their day, you may be the only person who has spoken to them that day or week.  In those life moments, you have an immense amount of power to make them feel included, loved, and accepted.  I promise if you take that step to show kindness to others around you, you can change the world, one act of kindness at a time!

3. Trust - The concept of trust can be simple and complex at the same time.  For some, trust can be gained very quickly and lost just as quick.  For others, trust is earned over time and then lost sometimes more quickly than it had taken to gain it.  What I’ve learned about trust through my life experiences is that if someone doesn’t trust you, they won’t share everything that’s on their mind and may be less prone to ask for help when they truly need it.  A common way to gain trust is to show authenticity and genuineness when you interact with others.  You can display all the acts of kindness in the world, but if someone sees through you and doesn’t believe that you’re being genuine in your actions, they will make it even harder to gain their trust.  Genuinely showing kindness can be earned through consistent and repeated acts of kindness shown to others.  They may be surprised at first and as you continue to come back each time with the same level of kindness, you’ll find that you will earn most people’s trust.  Remember to always stay true to your values and find regular, consistent ways to show kindness!

You may have noticed the quote at the beginning of this blog post.  Know that it’s one of my favorite quotes in life and I strive to practice this concept day in and day out.  When you’re able to align your values with kindness and look for daily opportunities to serve others in a more kind way, they will always know that you care.  Your challenge this week is to look for daily opportunities to be even more kind to others, show others that they matter, and remember to genuinely give back each time!

Keep growing and know that I truly believe in you!

• Ryan